Wednesday, January 14, 2004

Dying and Space

I just have a few scattered thoughts.

One of the members (Dan) of our church was diagnosed with melanoma about 7 years ago. He is in his late 60's I think. Well over the last couple months he has taken a turn for the worse. I have not seen him in a while as Christmas came and such. Being the associate I am not the primary pastor doing a lot of this visitation. Well I went over to his house. His wife is recovering from Hip replacement and so is on orders for no pressure on her hip. Thus there are a number of caretakers and the like. But I saw Dan. He is a shell of his former self. I could not recognize him. It was not him. He barely remembers anyone including his family. Its hard to say how much is his medication. I left and I cried. It just isn't right that people suffer so much. My biggest fear is dying a slow death where I gradually loose my mind. In fact it’s loosing my mind that I'm most frightened of. I told my wife "if I ever end up like that, take my ass to Oregon” She said she would never have me euphemized. I still wonder, is it better that people suffer then they just simply go to whatever is next while they still have some sort of dignity? I don't know but I just never want to be like Dan. This is the hardest thing I have to do as a pastor it makes me hate it at times.

On another note. Our president the hang em high Texan himself has said lets give NASA another billion reallocate 12 billion and let go to the moon. Hell lets go to mars. I'm not against space exploration but everyone shouts "it will bring technological advances." Are they worth it? How many people could be fed or who many people without health care can get it for the 13 billion we are spending in 5 years going to the moon? Is all the technology worth it? Is anyone willing to ask these questions? Will anyone stand up to Bush and say no? Let’s fix this world before we spend to money and recourses exploring others. If we set our minds to it we could cure malnutrition and give everyone health care and the technology would advance to meet these goals but we care to much about "is there water on mars" This man asks is there water in Africa or housing on skid row, or health care for the poor, or food for the refugees? Well is there? Until the answer is yes I don't give a damn if there is water on Mars.

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