Thursday, February 05, 2004

Response To Rebecca

Dwight and Rebecca have been talking a lot about opening up and looking at their past abuses and how it effects them. I was going to write to Rebecca encouraging her in her opening up and talking about things when the metaphor of marriage came to mind.

The church for the longest time has taught us to dress up and not be real. We dress up by putting on fancy clothes (a practice I despise), and then we dress up by putting on our fancy selves. We can allow other members of our family to see the real self. We go pretending everything is good. Its time to dress down.

Right now my wife is wearing sweats and a shirt I am in shorts. We are casual in our own house. We should be casual with other members of our family. It would be odd if T was in her nicest dress and I was in shorts. The same is true in church (our family). Everyone must dress down. Be casual with each other. Treat each other as family. We are real people with real problems.

However, I am not seeking a nudist colony. Marriage is a beautiful thing. We can be completely naked and vulnerable with our spouse. We would not go here even with our closest friends. There will still be levels to our intimacy. Certain things must be saved for the marriage bed.

I hope this metaphor makes sense. Maybe someone else can unpack it a little bit more.

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