Wednesday, November 30, 2005


Sitting at my desk trying to stay awake. There are no thoughts no revelations just a feeling of I Hate what we've done to Christmas. I do, I hate it. Buy this buy that sale here sale there. No sanity just moving non stop.

So here is a thought, I just realized that exactly 1 year ago I was doing my grandfathers funeral. So freaking busy I just forgot. I miss him I really do. I remember that day clear as water. Yet it seems so far away.

I guess I am just sitting here waiting, waiting for whatever is next.

A 17 year old son of one of our managers rang bells for me today. About 2 hours after he got out there some kids called him a N*^*^ and harassed him. He went home. I hate yes hate some of these idiots who use those words. Lets face the facts there are racists in this world. If I had been there I would have told them off. Anyway, I hope everyone is having a joyous Christmas season.

I hate Christmas.


I cant believe I am retyping this. The computer got rid of my last post. Anyway, here it is again.
Bill I read you sight now and then. It's most always depressing, with feelings of anger, frustration, hate, loathing or whatever. As I read it tonight I could just pass it by again. You say you hate Christmas...Yes, Christmas can be filled with struggle and things that are overwhelming. But it is also filled with joy and Birth. You can always choose to look at the bad side of things. You can decided to bring those feelings to others because of your own frustrations. But give the world a chance. Its not all's not all good. But this is love, and life, and joy. Soon you are going to have a child. I think about the parents you and Tolani will be and I am comforted because I know how much you both will love and care for this gift you have been given. Yet, this little boy/girl is going to look to you, mimic you, and can show him the disappointment filled in you heart over everything you so frequently speak of or you can show him the wonder and joy in a day of life, a day of church, a day of Christmas...whatever it is. Not everything is the end of the world. Not everything is bad. Try giving life a chance. Yes the world can be can also be awesome as you have experienced with meeting you wife and fathering your child in this world. You can hate me for my two cents like you seem to dislike much else or you can try to see something other than just the pain and the crap---there is more than that... Whether you care of not, I still love Tolani and you and pray that your child is healthy, happy, and secure. God Bless------shorty

By Blogger shorty, at 1:13 AM  

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Monday, November 28, 2005

O Football Gods

O football gods we give you thanks this day for causing those three kicks to miss and bring us to 9-2. We know that only you can cause those things so we thank you for acting favorably on us O Football gods. We bring this simple request to you today, that you would guide us to a win next week. We ask of of you o great gridiron deity to find favor with us and give us home field advantage throughout the playoffs. And O while you are at it, give us that day some rain so Alexander can run over people. O Football gods may you be praised.

My mom told me that she prays over parking spaces. So I thought I'd give it a try.

Lets hear it for a Calvinist God.

BTW: God does not give a rip about football but I think God is a seahawk fan so there.

Note: Raider Haters Rule!


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Sunday, November 27, 2005


Seahawks 9 and 2

Whats left to say?


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Thursday, November 24, 2005

Bah Humbug, Happy Thanksgiving, and all that

Bah Humbug, Happy Thanksgiving, and all that

I figure as long as I am an officer with kettles I will stand by my bah humbug stance. Its all too commercial anyway. It means family and shopping and stuff so you can tell I absolutely love Christmas.

Anyway, our kettles are going well so far. Hopefully we will have a good weekend. I just hope that I will b able to exceed the budget and get enough to complete the work on our chapel. It will be worth it then.

Baby is well we will know boy or girl before Christmas.

Our choir director goes to another church as well. There church will last 4 or more hours. I told her that this white likes church the way we have it, in and out in a hour and a half. If I could make it an hour I would. Boredom for me is doing the same thing over and over. The same songs, beat, words, whatever. I dream of church where no two Sundays where ever the same. I just don't have the creative juices to pull it off.

The week has been busy. Advisory board title for the stage, kettles, my route has be driving 6+ hours a day. Plus my mom is here. (I'll say nothing more on hat subject).

Needless to say thinking has not been something I've been doing much of. Life goes on and I keep getting up in the morning. We are going to Chinese food latter. I hope you all enjoyed your turkey.

Anyway, I hope to do some thinking on the incarnation as we go through this season. I'll post what I am thinking about latter.



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Thursday, November 17, 2005

The Judge or the Father

So in a meeting with a guy today we discussed the difference between relating to God as judge and God as Father (notably the story of the Prodigal Son). I am convinced that whatever metaphor's we use for God seriously impact our relationship with God and our theology. In these two (not to mention God as the Shepard who leaves 99 to search for 1) we have very different metaphor's for God. Unfortunately the evangelical church tends to focus on the judge. We call the judge righteous but we see this judge as the one who blesses and punishes. You know, if we are good then God blesses us, if we are bad then God punishes us.

My problem with it all is that this belief has led to things like Pat Robertson and stuff.

So how do you view God. Can the judge metaphor work?


I sat in a conference and heard a liberal Catholic speaker answer the question about women in the church. Should we ordain them or not? blah blah blah. We all know the questions.

His answer was great. "Let's call God 'she' for the next fifty years and see what happens."

It is our metaphors for God that shape how we view him/her. Let me state that it is just as incorrect physiologically to call God 'he' as it is to call God 'she,' since God has no gentials.

So can the judge metaphor work? By itself no metaphor of God can work, but in conjunction with loving parent, friend, shepard, servant, king, etc. then I would say "yes." However, it may be that we need to avoid calling God a judge for the next fifty years and see what happens.

By Blogger Dwight, at 8:36 AM  

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Wednesday, November 16, 2005

Here I stand

Here I stand on sandy ground
slipping falling running in place
Concrete would be easier
But the view is better here
everywhere I look people are running
runing to the rocks
they are tired of walking
the rock is safe, secure
but you can go nowhere
I guess I would rather be walking then sitting
feeling the sand then sitting on the rock
I'd rather risk then safe
Rather play with fire then stay cold
So I keep on walking
I know if I climb a rock I'll stay
Gotta keep moving
Gotta keep moving could be comfortable up there on the rock
No work no thinking
But it was so boring up there
I used to be up there one just like it
Some people waved me down said I was missing out
So started walking
It was hard after being raised on the rock
the sand is hard work
but it never gets boring
I'll never go back to the rock
I'll never go back to the rock
So I keep moving.


Bill that was helpful thanks. I made me remember - walking along the rocks along a rocky coastline in spain when we were on holiday. Actually it wasn't that easy - we ended up with scratches and a turned ankle - but it was safer than the raging ocean.

By Blogger Gordon, at 1:12 AM  

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Wednesday, November 09, 2005


Well the baby is doing well according to the ultrasound. To be honest I am still a bit scared. I mean being a father is not something I ever would have though 3 1/2 years ago. I guess I am simply afraid of it all. Afraid of failing (always my biggest fear) afraid that I won't be a good parent. I don't know just afraid. Friday is Veterans day and we are closed so we will take the day of. Harry Potter comes out the 18th so that should be a good date night before hell (aka Christmas kettles) starts. Some days I just wish for the 9-5. But that would drive me nuts.

So, here I am waiting for choir practice to end so we can go home. Every Wednesday I begin to think that the churches without music are on to something.

More about the baby, Tolani is going nuts because her next appointment is the first week of December and we may or may not find out sex. More likely we will find out during a 2 hour ultrasound with the specialist that looks at all kind of stuff. She don't want to wait that long. I don't know why. Its just another piece of info. I mean we still have 6 months of this.

Seahawks are 6-2 and will be 7-2 after they pound the Rams.

So latter y'all.


Congratulations on the baby! Our congregation is praying for the three of you. And last but not least, GO SEAHAWKS! 7-2, Mike is pretty excited about them, the kids and I have even been watching the games with him. Blessings, Nancy

By Blogger servantnancy, at 10:43 AM  

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Saturday, November 05, 2005

The other day

The other day I got angry (read really angry aka...) at the church. It all started on Wednesday.

The man walked into my office and shut the door. Said he wanted to meet regularly during his stay here, I asked why? He said I'm homosexual and mad at God. He recounted church after church the best ones stating "homosexuality is a sin but no different then the gossiping." He ended up starting to get overly involved in gay and lesbian church and his meetings started to slip. He finally was through playing the game and quit church. He relapsed soon after. He felt like he had an issue with God and yet was playing church.

Now, I do not want to get into a gay debate. For him that was the trigger. He feels guilty because the church had told him it was wrong. After talking here was the problem: for so long he had been told God this, God that, Bible this, Bible that, Church, God, Bible all the same. He could not keep them straight. I asked him to think about how these three are different. You see I believe the Church in many shades has perpetrated a pile of crap on America. We have told people that in thought, word, and deed that God, the bible, and church are one. We don't where one stops and the others begin. We say God is holy, as is the church and bible. God revealed himself to us through the bible alone so if we know the bible we know god. The church is god's body so to be part is to be in communion with God. Now some of this good but we should have a beginners class for all. God is God, Church is Church, and Bible is Bible. A lofty view of church is good but inaccurate. Church is simply a gathering on imperfect people trying to Love God and others (I guess this is a lofty view because usually church is a bunch of self important people who sing a few songs and sleep through a boring sermon just to get home and watch football or a bunch of overly religious fanatics who believe that all others are going to hell unless they convert.) The bible is a divine and human book. It has a lot for us and parts will form us if we let it but parts are simply history or census numbers, or contradicts itself. We must learn that while God has used it and continues to use it to reveal Godself to humanity we also have general revelation. (creation and the like) Revelation is God talking it is not God. Furthermore, the bible is a group of written documents written to specific people at a specific time. We must constantly remember this. So the bible is a timely book where God is timeless. God is the loving triune timeless one. Every description is different because description comes from two places. Either we describe the God we have been given (and the more churches the more messed up your given God concept is) or you describe the God with who you have a relationship. This relationship will be unique and different so your description of God will be as well. Anyway, I guess I'm angry at the church because too often the story is the same, here is your God its just like mine, and Oh by the way I know your homosexual and God hates that so you'd better stop, cuse God hates sin. Or the more accurate BTW God hates fags. At least the out there offensive jerks are not deceiving people with sweet sounding language.

Reason #2 I am angry at the church. We are counseling a couple. During the husbands addiction he has hit her and cheated on her. I really she should have left long ago but she is sicker then he is. He knows he is sick. She thinks that God will change him. God told her that God will change him all he needs is Jesus. He doesn't need the info of his addiction, he doesn't need help and groups he needs deliverance. Besides she believes in marriage because she "fears the wrath of Jesus." I guess I'm pissed at the church because parts of it (not all but way too many) feed this, create this, and breed this bull. A pastor should have told her long ago to leave the SOB. But instead she thinks He's oppressed and he needs to let his holy spirit shine out. Because he is always gloomy. If the Spirit was with him he'd be happy. She said Al-Anon was just info and Jesus enough. I'm sorry, in every instance I have met someone like this there has always been a "church" or group is the better word with a pastor spewing this bull. We will meet once more if he wants and I will refer them because my Pentecostal baggage (raised it deconstructed it and vehemently disagree with it) will come though.

So, there you go that is why I am mad at the Church today.

Please no if the comments become all about homosexuality I will be staying mostly silent I know I serve a God of mercy.



It hurts seeing people hurt by something you're part of, doesn't it? :-(

By Blogger Evangeline, at 7:29 PM  

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Currently reading

Well, lets go in reverse this week. Today I was at Costco and came across a great book. I am 30 pages in and can't stop laughing. I would highly recommend it unless you take yourself seriously. So far he has focused on two issues: gender and religion. Its by the great one so if swearing and anti-ir-non-religiousness offend you do me a favor and ignore this section of the blog. Please do not click on the link. Please stay away from George and enjoy some purpose driven marketing or TBN's praise-a-thon. But if you have respect for honesty, no matter how offensive, please "pick up and read" you laugh your head off. So enjoy. (BTW costco had it for 8.50)


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